Work Towards Oneness
Ephesians 5:28-31 “In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church—for we are members of his body. For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.”
Marital oneness can only occur within the context of God’s design for marriage. When the husband and wife both love Jesus and submit their lives and their will to him then they can experience complete oneness. They will each become bone of their bone and flesh of their flesh. They two with Jesus in their heart shall become one just as the Father, Jesus and the Holy Spirit are one. This is a mystery and we may not understand it until we get to heaven; nevertheless it is a truth from God and has been since the beginning of mankind.
It is typically harder for men to work towards oneness with their wives than it is for wives to work towards that goal with their husbands. Husbands know they are called to be leaders in their family but not often well trained for that role. They often fall short when it comes to becoming one spiritually and emotionally with their wives.
Ecclesiastes 4:12 “Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.”
The saying “A three strand cord is not easily broken” was unknown to me and when I first heard it. I did not understand its meaning and considered it an “Old Fashioned” or folk wisdom saying. Then one day a professor took apart a one-foot piece of twine made up of three strands. He then asked me to break each strand. I wrapped each end around my opposite hands then and using my strength I simply pulled it until it broke. I did this three times and then he handed me a one foot section of three strands and asked me to pull them apart as I had before. I was unable to do so no matter how hard I tried until my hands hurt. Then he explained “When a man and a woman each have a relationship with Jesus and then enter into a relationship with each other they become like that three-strand cord. Each gives strength and support to the other and together the cord cannot be easily destroyed”. When a man and woman seek the Lord together and give 100% support to each other, their relationship will become stronger.
This is not something you do only once or only while dating. This should become the focus of your life and relationship together; to build each other up every day for the rest of your lives. All relationship between husbands and wives tend towards separateness unless you are actively seeking to build oneness together.